“I wish I could say that I believe in Jesus Christ, that He loves me and cares, but I no longer believe that. From a mother who is vicious and has wrecked my adoptive family to the death of my adoptive brother, I no longer believe. I even find myself wondering if God really exists. I look around at all the Christians who say that they help people who don’t know how to ask for it, but they have not even noticed my pain. If God loved or cared for me, He’d at least help, wouldn’t He? But no help has come! Why? God doesn’t love me!” —Anna.
A disillusioned and devasted Anna wrote this painful letter to a Christian councellor. She was caught up in a feeling of hurt, abondonment and doubt, and this made it difficult for her to see God’s love, or appreciate His care. Invariably, hardship is able to make us cast aspersion on God’s goodness. And this of course is the root of all sins -when you think that God is not mindful of you -you are liable to do anything against his will.
“There are times when it is difficult to understand God’s method. There are moments when discerning His will is a frustrating endeavor. Perharps we have these moments because we havent been given all the information we need to ascertain His ways as well as His acts. Many times we learn more in rhetrospect than we do while in the thick of the struggle. Indubitably, there were times in everyone’s life when you feel so lonely and fearful. At such times, it is either we draw near to God, or allow our challenges to push us far away from Him.
When Jesus was faced with abandonement on the cross, He cried out to God, saying, “My God, My God, Why hast thou forsaken me?” Yes, He felt for once and for all the pains of loneliness because He was carrying the sins of the whole world. Thus, God turned his face against him, and He felt forsaken and condemned. This made him questioned the acts of God, but he never questioned his relationship with God like Anna did.
Unlike Jesus, Anna doubted the existence of God! She believed one of the lies of Satan, that God is a moral tyrant who knowing her predicaments has deliberately refused to help. Jesus’ statement means, “Even though you have forsaken me, You are still My God, My God!” Jesus never doubted or questioned his relationship with God, knowing that His affliction was justifiable, and temporary, and more importantly that God will be glorified by his troubles.
Yes, I agree that it is not easy to remain calm and faithful in frightening times, but looking unto God, the author and finisher of our faith, is sure the way of victory. Everything around you may fail, but God’s love for you is eternal, and independent of you. If God feeds the birds of the air, He cares for you so much more! You are winning! Yes, we are winning!